Archive for memories

Spring Garden Hopes

With each spring, thoughts of my garden flood my mind. Unfortunately, the picture in my mind is soon destroyed by weeds, negligence, hungry animals and such. Today, as I tried to work the soft wet soil, I saw that the grasses and weeds are already winning the fight. What they haven’t attacked, the wild turkeys and such have begun to take their toll.

I used to have a garden by my uncle’s house, he had a generator running from a creek, which he shared. Not only that, he often plowed for me when my children kept me too busy to even try. Now he is gone. My garden is on a level spot in my son’s yard, not near a creek or uncle. What I get out of my garden is laughable, still, it is part of me to TRY.

Perhaps I should freeze the picture of young plants struggling to take hold and remember that life is much like that. It never turns out the way we wish it would.

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The Ballerina Clock

The Ballerina Clock

I don’t usually go in for garage sales, but something about the hand painted sign attracted me. I pulled into the long dirt drive lined with cars, and headed toward the door of the 1960′s rancher,wondering what was drawing me to this house.

At first, it was just the usual, nick-naks, old clothes, furniture, books, a few silver vases, photographs. Then I saw it! A ballerina clock, like my aunt had once had. It was beautiful. I had missed it at my aunts sale when I had to go change a diaper. I know she would have wanted me to have it-I should have just taken it at the family preview, but I didn’t.

The clock was about 15 inches high. It had a windup on the bottom and played “Fur Elise”. I had wanted it for my daughters so badly! A ballerina came out a door and danced to the song when the clock was wound up. I truly thought it was one of a kind.

Of course, I will never know if this ballerina clock was my aunts, I doubt it. But it was now mine!

I carefully placed the clock, wrapped in old newspapers into a cardboard box and sat it gently in my car’s trunk. I couldn’t wait to finally give it to my daughter!

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Commercialized Holidays

Image

Valentines Day, Mothers, Day,

Fathers Day, so many more.

What if we don’t get a Valentine or box of candy?

What if we don:t see all of our kids, or parents

or put flowers on their graves?

If we must have a special day to recognize those we love,

then our love is shallow and lacking.

If we do not recognize them on these “special days”.

We are not appreciative, thoughtless…

Think of those you love every day, tell them every day,

love them every day. All of your lives will be much richer.

Today, I did not eat with all my kids,

I put flowers on my mom’s grave and my then-15 year old sons.

Today, I stood in line to eat lunch with part of them,

my lonely father order food he didn’t want and didn’t eat.

Having a friend take a photo of my son and I with my flowers.

Or my son showing me bullfrog tadpoles, meant much more.

Remember how short time is and how much today means.

Take the little treasures and keep them, for soon they slip away.

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M’Lady

She looked down at her beautiful green eyes, the look of thick black eyeliner around them and smiled.

“Oh, my beautiful!” she sighed, Parting is such sweet sorrow!” M’Lady’s whirls of black seemed to shimmer in the light. That picture would remain with her each day.

The tabby rubbed her legs, and purred. Sonja picked her up and scratched her under her chin as M’Lady looked up at her as if she were in heaven.

she could take her with her to the Bahamas.

 

“I wonder if she has any idea that I am going on vacation for a month?” Sonya though.

She glanced at her suitcases, wishing she could take her along.

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Estate Sale

Copyright-Ted Strutz

Today, an estate sale sign sat in the yard of my childhood friend. Thirty years ago, we all loved to go to Katie’s house. Wonderful memories filled my heart.

I stopped and walked in the door to the sale. It was as if I had gone back in time. Picking a few things that I remembered, I paid for them and returned to my car.

My hands were shaking. How quickly life goes by. Those treasures now sit on my mantle. What will happen to them if, one day, an estate sale sign sits in front of my house?

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Sleep- Word a Week prompt

Often sleep is my only relief. I relish the moments when I dream of my child-alive, myself-young, my world-hopeful. Although I find it discouraging to look at sleep as the best part of my day, it sometimes is. No pain, no real bad news, I don’t have to be afraid, things are the way I wish they had been, should have been, I wake with a smile.

Sleep, even in happy times, refreshes me, gives me energy and determination. In difficult times, it gives me a moment of relief, a moment where pain is not a constant, a moment with a friend or loved one who has been taken.

We sleep about 1/3 of our life. It gives us the energy and courage to live the other 2/3. Being able to relax enough to go to sleep is a blessing in its self. And no, my friends, goodnight.

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Earth Day, 1969-2013

I remember the first Earth Day. I was in Junior High, in the downtown area of my city for the first time, my generations first step away from our neighborhood elementary schools. It was the year schools were integrated in my town. How excited we were, to be part of this first Earth Day, we were the “babies” of the “hippie” culture and were anxious to be considered part of the idea behind Earth Day-cleaning up the environment, getting back to home gardens and self-sustaining ideas. Of course at our age, our ideas were limited, as the concept of waste and growing up in a throw away society was our world.

We had just begun to think like adults, have our own ideas and concepts. This is one of the very first days I remember with my mind in an “adult” format. I will never forget it. In celebration of Earth Day, our art class went out and sat on a grassy bank in front of our school and were told to draw pictures of what downtown looked like. I am sure there were kids who were just glad to be outside, but for me, sitting on that hill drawing a picture my perception of the small city was eye-opening. I had lived there all my life, but for the first time, I REALLY looked at my city. I noticed the huge church next door with the domed roof, I looked out at the dogwood trees blooming on down the hill on our school grounds I looked back at the small chipped-rock playground where “recess” and P.E. were held.

Suddenly” my city” became more than simply “my neighborhood. There were still rows of 20′s era building lining the streets beyond the school. There were woods and grassy areas behind the area where the old brick school building set. A red brick wall divided our school grounds from the street below. s I took this all in, the world seemed like a much larger place for the first time in my 14 years of life. i noticed a possibly homeless man wandering the sidewalk beyond the school. His clothes were old and tattered and he appeared to be rather unaware of where he was or in what direction he was going. Having grown up a protected only child who spent her time shopping uptown with my mother, I had given little though to life outside my safe urban world. There were no real “malls” in my town, a few “shopping centers”. No drunks staggered down the streets where I lived. Being “Homeless” was something that happened “somewhere else”, not in my town.

We had a speaker on that first “Earth Day” that introduced us to the concepts of taking care of the world we lived in. In 1969, the world was beginning to seem much smaller and it was happening very quickly. I could not imagine, at that time, how quickly those changes would take place. There were three black and white channels on TV, huge, unsightly receptor antennas stood on top of our homes to bring them to us. Telephones had dials and curly cords. No one that I knew had a microwave, although, I imagine some of the “rich” kids” did. Most moms didn’t work unless they “had to” or at least until their kids were old enough to get off the bus and stay home alone until she got there. Now, letting even a 14 year-old come home to an empty house gives moms an uneasy feeling. I lived in a very innocent world.

There were many more Earth day celebrations in my future, all in an increasingly frightening, yet more aware world. We planted trees, cleaned up river banks, volunteered in homeless shelters. We became aware of the world around us. Sadly, the opening of the door to the fact that we MUST start taking care of our world, was the beginning of the end of the innocent world I grew up in. The old brick Junior High was torn down the next year. The hill was leveled, along with the woods and playground. An interstate now “by-passes” the tunnel through the mountain, which long separated my side of town just as the high bridge across the river separated us from the other side of town.

Integration was the rule and we were at its inception. The concept of Middle School replaced Junior High. There were several big race” riots in the remaining years old my secondary education. Surprisingly, I don’t remember having problems with people with different colored skin. I do, however, remember that though we went to “same” schools, we rarely did things with children who were of a different color form u, or from a different part of town. Earth Day songs played by John Denver Appeared. The whole concept of saving our world from pollution and saving our poor from deprivation became a project for various civic groups.

Earth Day, in 2013 is very different from the first Earth Day. The focus, has ironically returned to its roots, but it is now organized, with special events, a more modern focus. As I talk to my grandchildren, who are still young, and to my teen, who is the age I was at earth Days inception, their world is already a much bigger place. News spreads fast, violence is everywhere, most moms have to work, cable TV, cell phones, technology in general are a part of their world from the time of their birth.

Still, I feel something very important is missing from their more protected, more violent, more technological world. There is an expectation of “things”, there are less moms fixing dinner for the family as they talk about how their day went. The is a lack of innocence, a lack of closeness and dependence among each other in families that to me is simply sad. Everyone is in their room playing with their ipods, ipads, computer games or watching recorded programs from Cable TV. They are not together, not reading books to the little ones at bedtime, not growing up appreciating the bonds of family or the importance of relationships with real people.

I would like to see Earth Day become part of a new trend towards family, community, doing things because they are right or good, rather that to get extra credit in school or bragging rights at the office. I would love to spend a day, heck a lifetime with my children and grandchildren able to savor the simple things in life, like sitting on a hillside drawing pictures with a pencil and table. My daughter, now the mother of two, won a regional prize or a report with the topic, “We must learn to ‘baby’ “Mother Earth”.

Today, I feel a good topic would be, “We must learn that ‘family life’ exists beyond electronics”.

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All Washed Up

wasp-nest

He chased her down the beach laughing, catching her as she ran. He panted, then laughed, “I didn’t think I was going to catch you after all my planning!”

She looked down , suddenly realizing what was happening and gasped..

“You make me feel like the wild winds of the ocean.” he smiled as he put the ring on her hand. “I have no doubt that I want to spend every minute of my life with you., will you marry me?”

With the ring safely on her finger, they danced in the waves.

“Oh, my God!” “Oh my God!” She cried. The ring was gone.

Suddenly a wave washed up between her searching hands. Something sparkling amidst the shells. She grabbed the ring and smiled up at him, “I forgot to say, ‘I will, she laughed.”

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Long, Long Time by Linda Ronstadt

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As the Line Was Crossed, Her Life became her Own.

He stood at the end of the trailer’s living room, yelling, cussing, throwing things, like he always did when he was angry.

She, of course, was in the hall by the washer, crying, her face speckled. red streaks, tears dripping onto her shirt.

I’m so sick of your bitchin, woman!” he shouted from the doorway, ready to run out, after he had yelled his final insult, stomped and delivered his final accusation.

Just step over the line and see what happens.” he yelled as he went for the door. As the line was crossed, he stared in silence.

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